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Cover of How to Make Friends with the Dark
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How to Make Friends with the Dark

by Kathleen Glasgow

A quiet, emotionally direct YA novel about losing a parent, moving through foster care, and trying to find a sense of belonging when nothing feels stable.

What It's About

How to Make Friends with the Dark follows Tiger through the months after her mother's death, when the life she knew gives way to a string of foster placements and the constant work of finding a place to sleep and a way to feel steady. The story stays close to Tiger's point of view, so grief reads less like a theme and more like a daily condition: the sense that everything is temporary and that other people's decisions shape your life.

Glasgow's style is spare and emotionally direct. Scenes tend to be short and concrete, and the prose relies on small observations rather than long explanations, which suits a narrator who is guarded and often numb. It sits closer to the quiet, character-driven end of the YA shelf than to plot-heavy mysteries, so readers who want a steady pace of events may find some stretches slow, though that pacing mirrors Tiger's disorientation.

The experience is less about racing toward an answer than about accumulating feeling. It is a heavy read, with grief, instability and uncertain family ties at its center, and it asks you to stay with a character who is still working out what hope might look like. Expect to finish it wanting to talk about it, and perhaps wanting something lighter afterward.

Read this if you…

  • want a character-driven YA novel about grief and family rather than a plot-heavy thriller
  • are interested in how loss and unstable housing affect a teenager's sense of self
  • enjoy spare, emotionally direct writing that leaves room for your own interpretation

Skip it if you…

  • need a hopeful, lighthearted read right now, since this one stays heavy for most of its length
  • want a realistic, detailed account of the foster care system or the legal steps involved

Key Ideas

  1. 1

    Grief as an everyday condition

    The novel treats loss less as a single event and more as a background that colors ordinary days. Tiger's grief shows up in routine decisions, in what she can and cannot say, and in the exhausting effort of pretending things are fine. Readers get a sense of how grief can flatten a life while still requiring you to keep functioning.

  2. 2

    Family that is found rather than inherited

    With no grandparents, aunts or uncles to fall back on, Tiger has to consider what counts as family. The book asks whether blood ties are the only real ones and what it costs to let a new connection matter. The hope it offers is tentative, and it is tied to the question of whether Tiger can trust anyone again.

  3. 3

    The instability of foster care

    Moving from home to home is shown as a series of small losses, each with its own adjustments, rules and strangers. The repetition is part of the point: Tiger's sense of self is repeatedly packed up and unpacked. The book is more interested in how this feels from inside than in the systems that produce it.

  4. 4

    Spare prose that trusts the reader

    Glasgow often lets images and short beats do the emotional work instead of explaining feelings outright. This restraint makes the book feel intimate and sometimes raw. It also means the reader has to fill gaps and pay attention, which some will find rewarding and others may find distancing.

Limitations

Some readers find the emotional intensity relentless, and the hope that arrives through a single new relationship can feel neat for a story this bleak. Because the book stays close to Tiger's interior experience, it offers little detail about the foster care system or the practical process of a child's placements, so readers looking for a realistic procedural account will need another source. Her mother is also seen only through Tiger's eyes, which limits how fully the reader can understand her.

Questions Readers Ask

Is How to Make Friends with the Dark only for teen readers?
It is shelved as YA, and its language and structure are accessible to teens. Adults who like emotionally direct, character-driven fiction will find it a quick read. Adults who prefer dense, complex prose or a fast-moving plot may find it too slight, and those sensitive to grief-heavy stories should be prepared for a sad book.
Should I read Girl in Pieces before this book?
You don't need to. Girl in Pieces is the author's earlier New York Times bestseller and is also a dark, emotionally demanding novel. Reading it first gives you a sense of Glasgow's voice and themes, but this book works on its own, and it may suit you better if you want a slightly more hopeful arc.
Published
2019
ISBN
9781101934753
Difficulty
beginner
Category
Young Adult

Book details and cover from Google Books.

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